Why Is It Hard to Start?
We’ve all been there—knowing it’s in our best interest to start something important. You know the thing, yes, that thing, the one that makes you feel guilty and worried for not doing it. Once again, you’ll leave your project until the last minute, only to be overwhelmed with guilt and regret. So, why do we keep doing this?
The First Step Is Not a Step
The things we are supposed to do aren’t like automatic bodily functions, such as a heartbeat, that happen on their own. These tasks carry meaning and emotional weight, resonating with our anxiety. Sometimes, just thinking about them is enough to trigger anxiety. Our willful procrastination is actually a way of trying to make ourselves feel safe and good again. It’s the part of us that wants to protect us by pulling us away from the chaotic mental space our responsibilities create.
I’m not here to tell you that you’re the problem and that you should push through your feelings. It’s possible that your lifestyle doesn’t suit you. Maybe the life you’re living is giving you responsibilities you dread. Perhaps Philosophy isn’t really your thing, and your procrastination on that final paper is your body’s way of saying, “Hey, this really isn’t for me.” However, I will tell you that there’s a pattern here, and if we don’t recognize it, we can get trapped in a spiral.
The actions themselves don’t have emotions attached to them. It’s our relationship with these actions that gives them emotional weight. Every time we accept these emotional perceptions, we reinforce them. Yes, the essay or presentation due next Monday is important, and yes, you want it to be great. But every time you think about starting it, you tell yourself it’s going to be hard. Each time you say, “I need to start this,” you actually push yourself further away from beginning. The truth is, the first step is not really a step. There’s no barrier to starting. There’s no gap between not starting and starting, no gap between doing and not doing. We imagine a gap, convincing ourselves that starting requires a huge, almost impossible leap, and that it will be incredibly difficult. Yet, this gap doesn’t exist. You can simply take 30 seconds to look at what you need to do, and if you feel like it, you can make a small mental plan. The 60 seconds you spend doing this is exactly how the rest of your time will pass until your project is complete.
Postpone Everything… Except the Next Smallest Step
Procrastination isn’t just about delaying tasks; it’s a blend of postponing some actions while refusing to delay others. We delay the project as a whole, but we refuse to delay the actions of the later stages and focus on the first step. We often believe we procrastinate due to a lack of trust in our present selves, but it’s actually about not trusting our future selves. If we trusted our future selves, we would take the first step and leave the rest to them. We mistakenly believe we need to carry the entire burden at once. Who wants that? Is it even possible? We can only take one action at a time. The mind’s ability to worry about the entire process contrasts sharply with the way we actually do things—one step at a time. Each step provides a clearer view of the next. We never know exactly what path to take, but we trust ourselves to take the next step and trust our future selves to do the same.
I find it very helpful to break down our goals into small, manageable steps until we reach something we’re comfortable doing right now. Need to apply for a visa? The first step could be as simple as opening Google. The second step could be searching for the requirements. To break down your goal into smaller tasks, you can use a notepad or an app like Nudger. (This is exactly why it exists) Then, start with the steps you’re comfortable with. If you encounter a daunting subtask, try breaking it down further.
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